After getting diagnosed with cancer, many of us have the reality of our life's limits thrust into our face.
If not by the prognosis doctors give us, but in the treatment we receive from others, as if we are already dead. The fear a death is pervasive and mysterious, people don't talk about it, let alone plan for it. Never the less it is FEAR, which has no place in life. It only serves to repress us. Through the process of talking through our fears and speaking the taboo we are free to LIVE!
Death Diner was started with Vanessa, a Stage 4
Endometrial Cancer and Breast Cancer warrior. She was living
as a shut in for three years after her metastatic diagnosis. Her
spirit was bright and she loved life. I couldn't understand why
such a fun person, despite physical setbacks, wasn't doing
more. Despite working as a mortician much of her life, she was
frozen in fear of her impending death. Together we worked on
overcoming the unavoidable. I went with her to make her funeral arrangements, took gothic photos in the cemetery with her and helped her to face her fears. We had an in-person meet up once a month where a small group of interested individuals shared our stories. She held on dearly to life, to stay here with me and the ones she loved. October 23rd, 2020 she succumbed to the cancer that was throughout her body, she was just 46 years old.
I believe it is time again to start the Death Diner with all the world has been through, it is much needed not only in the breast cancer community but the world as a whole.